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Friday, February 12, 2010

RanDumb: Record-breaking Edition

When you’re stuck in the house for the better part of a week due to the wrath of an historical snow storm it comes in handy to have a unhealthy relationship with technology.

Because then you have the Internet to take your mind off of the fact that you have a splitting, record breaking headache to go along with being trapped inside for a record number of days with three noisy boys and one snow shoveling obsessed husband thanks to the record-breaking snowfall of the century.

You’ll have to forgive me if I’ve been less than my sunny, cheerful self.

I’m having a record-breaking week. And it’s exhausting (and messy, and cold, and wet, and annoying).

But, it’s good to know that I’m not the only person who is starting to show signs of an impending psychological event*…

I’m thinking that Mr. Kosek’s pre-record-breaking-snownomenon personality was a little bit sketchy, but still, good example of what happens When Mother Nature Attacks (could totally be one of those Fox shows).

In an effort to get my snowsessed mind on something else though, I also spent countless hours this week watching TV, something I used to do on a semiprofessional basis (watching TV for hours per week was definitely one of my most important pre-#3 hobbies).

Sadly**, pretty much everyone on American Idol can sing at this point so I don’t have any funny so-you-think-you-can-sing-leave-it-to-Simon-to-tell-you-you-can’t videos to share with you this week.

But.

Thanks to the Idol hopefuls and their inability to pick a song that won’t make them look like a bunch of blubbering idiots, you can laugh along while they mumble sing Gwen Stephanie’s Escape…

The funniest thing about this whole deal is that each of them actually thought they’d be able to sing this without screwing it up.

Why?

Why would you assume that a song most of us have trouble with in the privacy of our own bathrooms would be the perfect showcase of your singing abilities in the most important (and stressful, and nerve wrecking, and publicized) audition of your life?

Because they who began as are over confident fools have grown egos that have been grossly inflated by being selected to participate in the most influential singing show of all time, you say?

Perhaps.

The most surprising thing is that so many of them lead the same delusion-filled life (like 3 groups picked the same impossible song).

I’m not privy to any obscure Idol statistics or anything, but I’d venture to say this song is up there close to breaking the record for song-most-likely-to-be-picked-that-you-have-little-chance-of-being-able-to-sing-correctly.***

Probably somewhere right behind The Star Spangled Banner, ‘cause for whatever reason, people just can’t seem to EVER get the words to that song right either.

Tip to all of the RanDumb American Idol hopefuls of the future: pick a song a toddler can sing.

Like Halo (don’t watch unless you agree to ignore any elements of my voice you may hear in the background of the video, it’s about the 2 year old baby-boy-Beyonce, not me)…

Please forgive the poor recording, he freaks out if he detects that he is actually being filmed so I have to get all Candid Camera on him.

And finally, from a show I enjoyed watching over the unsolicited, unappreciated, totally uncalled for “break”, a man who has something to share with fathers/husbands everywhere that could help save them from making a RanDumb mistake that could quickly and easily lead to their death…

Jim Breur’s Comedy Central Special in which he speaks on Why Mother’s Need Their Sleep.

Priceless!

Don’t forget that today is THE LAST DAY TO ENTER THE FUGLY FACE PHOTO CONTEST TO BE NAMED PBD’S BLOG DAWG OF THE YEAR! Awesome prizes are up for grabs and voting starts Monday so, even if you were too chicken to actually enter, be sure to come back and vote for the face that scared you the most!

And, once you've examined the contest link and submitted your entry, go ahead and check out Mrs.4444s to link up your favorite Friday Fragments posts of the week!

*Nice way to say you are losing your effing mind!

**I say sadly because I fully enjoy watching the deluded, tone deaf citizens of America as they are ripped to shreds by my most all time favorite British person. It makes me smile inside.

***I love RanDumb, obscure statistics like the ones they always come up with at sporting events: “Hey, Charles, did you know that this player is the first to ever score a three point shot while wearing white shoes with black stripes and being a left handed shooter with 3 seconds left on the hot clock?”

13 comments:

singedwingangel said...

Sorry I missed your post yesterday, you are welcome to come down to Ky where we have snow but can get out and it is not snowpocalypse... PLUS your kids could sled down a hill without fear of frostbite lol

Jen said...

sooooo funny, LOL!! and your son is totally adorable!

Jen said...

Loved your little Beyouce

And that video on why mom's need sleep is so funny b/c its true. I just had a night like that last night and I wanted to murder Jeff b/c he slept through all the kids wakings. How can men to do this?

Kmama said...

I can't watch the videos until I'm home. Nasty virus on my work computer has my gunshy to watch/stream any media. BUMMER!!

I did see the American Idol bit this week, and yeah, T.E.R.R.I.B.L.E. That was so bad.

Shell said...

Crap- it's today? I didn't get to storage this week.

Mira said...

Why moms need sleep video just made me laugh until I cried. So sleep deprived and I haven't given birth to the last one yet. Oh, he doesn't know what a demon is yet. It's only getting worse. Great video. Will have to share

I'm NOT a VOLCANO! said...

HAHAHAH! I laughed so hard through that whole thing on why mom's need sleep! LOL! It's another one I have to show to DH (Who laughed so hard at your Don'ts list that he turned red) because I DO THIS ALL THE TIME!!

SMJ said...

Your Boy-ance is too cute!

Thanks for the laughs...I needed it today girl, I'm telling ya!

faemom said...

You know what sucks. My husband did something to the computer, and I can't hear anything, and he won't be back until Sunday night. Guess I'll go bum some computer time off my folks.

Jennifer said...

That video is awesome, and OH SO TRUE!!!! Men, blah.

The Half Assed Housewife said...

That weather dude needs some serious medication!

Jennifer said...

I am just getting around to watching the weatherman... oh.my.god. I LOVE THAT! I think if our weatherman had done this, I would have peed my pants! But, I feel for him...I'm experiencing the winter crazies too! Awesome! I can't believe we didn't hear the off-camera crew laughing.. maybe they all ran thinking he might pull out a weapon.

Qoddess said...

You've been quoted on my blog:
http://qoddessquotesblogs.blogspot.com/

Giving away two copies of the movie Extract starring Jason Bateman and Ben Affleck. Contest ends 4/2/10.
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