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Tuesday, June 2, 2009

A Knock on the Door...

And it's shoes!

Shoes in the mail. Yeah for me!

I didn't even have to leave the comfort of my couch to obtain this lovely treat.

They arrived in their green adorned, Piperlime box courtesy of one special lady known around here as Mimi.

My mommy sent me shoes!!!!

Moms know you best no matter how old you get (remember that boys, no woman will ever know you the way I do).

And, look, aren't they cute?!

The card inside informed me that people might be envious of my excellent fashion sense and obvious good taste, so I'm prepared for what you are thinking.

I'd show you how they look on, but I'm in desperate need of a pedicure as it appears a very large dog has chewed on the end of my foot.

But, #3 with his never ending selflessness has agreed to model them for me.

He says they are quite comfy, and they taste good too!


Even though this has nothing to do with shoes, I have to say a few words about the Bachelorette (of course I watch!) since it is in its 3rd week and I have yet to discuss it with you (and by discuss I mean give you an in depth essay about why they are idiots).

First, Jillian will kiss anything with lips!

I know all the Bachelors do it, but honestly, it's kinda gross with them too.

The fact that they are kissing is not particularly what grosses me out, it's the fact that I have to watch them kissing. I'm just starting to get geeked out by all the tongue swabbing going on.

And the guys...

Some of them are serious numbskull's.

Like, Bachelor David. WTH is up with that dude? I swear he was roid raging last night. And, don't even get me started on the stumbling, drunken stupor he accepted his rose in. I must admit I enjoyed his swagger (appropriate use of word here) initially, but he's gotten a bit outta hand as of late.

Not that I don't understand because Bachelor Juan is a freakin' woman.

Something about that dude totally irks me (and it's not his 35 year old baby face, 'cause I normally go for that look). Maybe it's my penchant to immediately root against the "nice" guy (bad boys rule!), but I really don't think so. I think it's more the fact that his is a simp (see Urban Dictionary for definition).

Moving right along to another annoying presence, Bachelor-put-that-guitar-down-or-so-help-me-Wes. I seriously wanted to gouge my eardrums out last night because he was beating that song like a dead horse. Seriously dude, you are not that awesome and the he-sings-for-me-how-sweet boat sailed on like the first episode. So, shut it already!

Right now, my favorite (not to win, just for entertainment purposes) is Bachelor Tanner P. I'll admit that the foot fetish deal is a bit creepy, but at least that dude is good for a laugh. And, as a completely unskilled human who excels at nothing in particular, I can appreciate the lack of talent this man exhibits. So what if you can't break dance, speak a foreign language, or sing the same mediocre song exactly the same way repeatedly? Besides, I feel like he is misrepresenting himself because I bet he has a pretty amazing foot lick technique, and some girls (not me, because I find feet repulsive) are probably in to that.

Glad she got rid of Sasha, thought he looked like Beast from that TV series on in the late '80s.

Right now I'm pulling for Ed, Jake, or Robby. Yeah, I think I like Robby. He's cute in a normal, everyday kinda way. He's nice in a real guy, not loser girly-man kinda way. Just wish he had a real job. 'Cause unless he owns the bar, bartender may not have too many opportunities for growth.

The rest of them are generally forgettable, space fillers at this point, but maybe we'll uncover some hidden talents or before unnoticed hotness as she filters through them on future episodes.

I know this shoulda been two posts, but I'm unfocused like that:)


Dianne said...

Don't you just love that Piperlime packaging, it's half the fun. So glad you like the shoes, Mommy loves you.

Jennifer Juniper said...

Sometimes shoes can make it all better :)

I have to say, I cannot get into the Bachelorette! I've tried and failed. You're right the over-kissed thing is gross.

Shannon said...

Mommies ARE the BEST!! My mom surprises me with shoes and clothes every now and again and I LOVE it!

TubOfLard said...

What grosses me out is that most of the kisses look so damn horrible. I mean what's up with these dudes? They're on tv with millions of people watching and that's the best they can do? Nice bag of tricks. Seriously, they need to up their game.

Jennifer said...

Oh! I love getting packages in the mail - especially ones with shoes in them! :-)

TKW said...

Okay, you crack me up!

You know what you gotta love about shoes? No matter how big your butt gets, shoes still fit. I salute you, shoes! You forgiving little guys! Even when I'm big as a barn, you are still there for me!

I don't know about any of the Bachelorette guys, because we are in potty training hell here. It's a full time job; I'm definitely wishing I could outsource this task. Any takers? thought not. Love your blog!

Keep It Classy, Jen said...

CRACKING up about Jillian will kiss anything will lips!! Yes I will be at SITScation with bells on!

Giving away two copies of the movie Extract starring Jason Bateman and Ben Affleck. Contest ends 4/2/10.
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