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Monday, November 23, 2009

Make New (i)friends Monday

So, one of the bestes things about blogging is all of the new "friends" you get to make.

Not real-life-meet-for-coffee-complain-about-in-laws type friends, but still, friends.

This phenomenon of on-line friend making needs a name.

This situation in which you may not even know the person's real name or where they live; you may not know how old they are or if they secretly weigh 800lbs and have not left their basement in the past 6 years.

But, despite not knowing all of these facts you know that you like "talking" to them (I write a post, you leave a comment, I respond by email if you hooked your crap up right so that I could) regularly, perhaps even daily .

You know that they are funny, and caring, and that they like taking pictures, but suck at crafting.

You know about their husbands and their children and their IRL friends.

I like to call these people whose lives I stalk mercilessly follow, whose families I've grown to know and care about, whose daily adventures I'm interested in, ifriends (perfect, right?! But don't Google it 'cause some raunchy "adult" site comes up, and don't tell those Mac dudes about it either, they might flip their lids).

People like Angie @ Seven Clown Circus, CK @ Bad Mommy Moments, and Supah D @ Adventures of a Wanna-be Supah Mommy (seriously, ladies, if you don't feel similarly just leave a nice comment anyway b/c otherwise I may lose my mind), who I am inappropriately in love with read daily, send emails to randomly, and would totally go on a girl date with if invited.


Like real friends, but without all the factual information that could creep you out, or the face-to-face interaction that could get tiresome and laborious.

The best thing about ifriends is that they are easy to make, provided you're not a jackhole (so my new favorite word, but I'm not sure quite what it means so if it's offensive awesome sorry!) who gets off on hurting others (aka leaving evil I-hate-myself-but-I'm-taking-it-out-on-you comments all over the place).

Here are my tips for making ifriends:

1. Read their sh**. The worst part about new blog visitors who are seeking exposure (by leaving comments all over the place) is that they don't really read your post. So, I may have written this touching post about how I'm all torn up because my fish died (which really would be sad b/c we've had those little buggers for like 3 years) and ended with a picture of my kid smiling by the tank and they leave a comment that says, "Awesome fish! Hope he doesn't die!" Instantly, not gonna be an ifriend.

2. Be nice. Because there is really no reason to not be. It's not like IRL when some jerkwad at work is constantly eating at you with her annoyingly rude comments and condescending, unappreciative behavior. In that situation it's totally okay if, after weeks of torture, you eventually snap, and tell her that she's an ignorant, self centered, loser with the body of an 8 year old and a kid who bears a striking resemblance to Shrek. Totally understandable. But, not the case in Blog Land. If you don't like what someone is saying (or how their kids look) just navigate away. I get all P-Oed at those imbeciles who have to insult others on their own blog. It's like stopping by my house and telling me I'm ugly and my food sucks. Not okay. Seriously, if you don't like it, or me, or whatever, just. Don't. Read. Not a good way to make ifriends because not only will the person you insulted hate you, most of her readers probably will to.

3. Write good well good? so that people can understand you, include a few pictures, and slim down those ads. Then people will want to visit you over and over and over again. I can name a few people (I'm not gonna, see #2 above) whose blogs I tried to get into reading but couldn't because the writing was sooooo poor. Blogging, if you want others to read it, is honestly, just not for everyone. Some people are just not very good writers (and by writers I mean people able to construct a grammatically correct sentence, not actual writing for publication writers) which means that their blogs are not very fun to read. Thinking hard to muddle through grammatical mistakes is not my idea of fun. That's why I quit teaching (not really, but it wasn't fun then either). Just a fact, not a put down.

Need a little help finding some new ifriends of your own?

Don't mind if I do!

Try these So Not Dumb bloggers whose awesomeness has earned them Dumb Mom's seal of ifriending approval.

That's right ladies, go ahead and wear this badge of honor with pride!

Because you know what? Dumb Mom ifriends are the new black!

Faemom. She's crafty, and smart, and witty, and funny as crap. Mom of two boys with another (of some sex still to be determined I believe) on the way. Worth a read a, definitely one of my besteses ifriends.

When Did I Become My Mother
. Real name unknown (to me at least) which proves my point that ifriends don't bother with silly things like names. She's laid back, and easy going, maybe because of the beautiful ocean paradise she calls home. She loves her three kiddos and always leaves nice comments.

Unknown Mami. Whose name I obviously don't know, but whose blog I enjoy everyday, especially on Sundays (go see why for yourself). Plus, her bag face (Book Bag, so effing funny!), photos crack me up!

Smart Pumpkin's Mom. She's the yin to my yang. The up to my down. The smart to my dumb. I'm not even close to being smart enough to explain what kinda knowledge this lady is dropping on us. You'll just have to read her yourself.

Miss Dot's Cupcake Spot. Did somebody say cupcakes? Deliciously-iced-no-wonder-you-weigh-a-ton cupcakes? They are sweet, and show is she!

I'm planning to do this every Monday, but I'd like to feature a guest poster in the future.

You know, 'cause I'm kinda lazy and stuff.

Anyone interested?


I'm putting a Mr. Linky in here so that we can all get to know you potential Dumb Mom ifriends of the future. Be sure to link to your best stuff so we can fall in lurve with you!

A note: Anyone who may, possibly consider writing a guest post for PBD or another blogger can leave a link here. Or, if you just know that you are awesome and want the rest of the world (aka the 18 people who read this blog) to know it, then you can go ahead and leave your links too. You might just end up being one of PBD's new ifriends (to be blabbed about in future posts) because I like awesome. It's sorta my thing.


JoeyRes said...

In my own little world hubby has the iPhone and does iRacing. So in return I run the iVacuum and cook on the iStove. Just so he's not the only one having all the fun.

I do like the iFriends post, the point about leaving nice comments is especially poignant for me at the moment. If a person doesn't like a certain blog they should click on and click away!

When did I become my Mom said...

Awww! I heart you too! I feel so honoured! Thanks sweetie! You picked some great girls. And you made some great points. I got one of those 'Awesome!' comments the other day and it was so out of place it confused me and I had to go back and re-read what I'd written. Unforgettable for the wrong reason...

I have fave blogs to tell u about. Will post them later! Thanks again for sharing the love!

ShellSpann said...

Those are awesome tips :)

Jennifer said...

I was really hoping for a picture at the end with a kids standing next to something that was broken or dead so I could leave a comment and then a psyche, but you didn't do that so you basically ruined my clever comment. But I still love you anyway.

KK said...

I love this and love being your ifriend!

Keyona said...

Great post! I know how you feel. I think it's annoying when people leave random comments that obviously state they only ready the first and last sentence of my post. I'll Guest Blog for you anytime!

Kris said...

I have been following your blog for quietly for a week or so now with not one comment. It seems everytime I try to comment with my incredibly witty statements, one of our many kids or worse yet, one of the aliens (THE teens) come to bother me, and then suck that brillant idea/comment right out of my head.

Whew, sorry for the Loong sentence. I find myself doing that alot lately, must be the fact that I only have time for ifriends lately, and try to quickly shove all ideas at once into one quick spot. (it's the aliens i tell ya)

Seriously, I have really enjoyed your posts, quick wit, humor and not so dumb ideas. It's been a great joy to be a new follower.

Kris said...

Ugh, I did it again, the whole point of my comment was to also say thanks for the links to some of your great ifriends. I'm enjoying reading those too!

TKW said...

I love it when I get introduced to new awesomeness! Thanks!

I'll guest blog for you any time, Sassy Pants.

Mary Anne Gruen said...

I like the name iFriends too! Thanks for suggesting those other blogs. I love Unknown Mami's picture too. LOL

Usually I don't make a fuss over fish dying, but the parrot fish in my home office is going to be the exception when the time comes. He's lived at least six years and he's the last one of the large group he came with. The lady who became his mate passed on earlier in the year.

For some reason I've never gotten around to naming him. But still, he's special.

Simply Valorie said...

I love the term iFriends, that's cute. But definitely something we need to hide from Mac, they really will flip out. As for your comment about people who leave rude comments on blogs -- THANK YOU. I seriously DO NOT understand why people feel a need to leave a comment saying "wow, you're a douchebag" and only saying that! Really, way to waste your time and mine by posting that comment. You could have saved us both a lot of effort if you'd just navigated away from my page.

Wow, I didn't realize I had so much pent up anger right there. Whew.

lululu said...

So true! One time I posted a recipe saying how much I hated one of the ingredients. But then I made it since my husband loved it.
Some random blogger left a comment saying something like "Oh, I love that your use that ingredient cos I'm, just like you, also a big fan."
Sometimes I just think how easy it is to embarrass yourself.

parentingBYdummies said...

Doesn't anyone want to be my ifriend? I don't see any links on here so how am I gonna choose my next guest posting ifriend? So sad right now!

stepfabulous said...

I can't wait to check out the blogs that you've posted here. As far as grammer errors, I KNOW which side of that fence I fall on! LOL. I wish I were a better writer, probably would be if I weren't rushing all the time. :)


Your iFriend

P.S. Did you LOVE New Moon? Esp the shirtless scenes! LOL

Jennifer said...

I would love to be your ifriend, but I'm terrified of guest posting. What if I got horrible writer's block and didn't have anything to say at all? OMG, what a nightmare. Yikes. I'm shaking just thinking about it.

Anonymous said...

This is an awesome post. I always love finding new blogs to mean read. I absolutely {heart} your blog!
I left something for you at mine. {}

Miss Dot said...

Hey, so, sweet fish. Hope it doesn't die or anything.

RE: No Mister Linky's -- HE-LLOOOOOOO!!! HERE I AM!!!!!

P.S. -- do you know that I sat in line for 7 hours to watch New Moon on Thursday night/Friday morning? I only do that for explicitly amazing movies. Like Star Wars. And Harry Potter.

P.P.S. -- I'll volunteer for the position of guest poster!

P.P.S. -- I first tried to post this comment but I'd done my HTML incorrectly for one of the bolds. I just think it's so funny when they say, "Your HTML cannot be accepted." For some reason, I always read that as: "Your kung fu is weak." Haha.

Adrian's Crazy Life said...

Hi girlies, I've just McLinkied myself (is that a verb?) I'll guest post for ya anytime. You've got a fun place happening over here and your dudes are SO cute! And since you've met me in real life, you know that I don't weigh 800 pounds and I've left my basement at least once - for an awesome weekend in Vegas, no less! Catch ya later.

pixielation said...

I love finding new people (who blog) to go and check out, and this is a great way to do it! There are so many people in the 'sphere', but only a small amount are entertaining, witty, poignant or meaningful. Reading recommendations from others is a great way to find quality people.

blueviolet said...

Hey, what about a fish? You have a fish and it died? Sorry. (kidding) I mean I wouldn't be kidding about being sorry about a fish that had really died but since there's no fish, alive or dead, I'm not sorry at the present time.

I can't even go on from there. I've confused myself.

Mira is triplet crown said...

I wonder sometimes about those blogs by illiterate people myself. And sometimes they're highlighted by places like my multiples blog group and I'm all, why do you think we should all read this one? Some people just write crap and yet people read them. Hard to understand.

I hope I can get funny again, and when I do, I'd love to be your iFriend.

The (Un)Experienced Mom said...

Heck yeah, count me in! Sign me up for it all....visitors, guest blogger, girl date, whatever!

Awesome idea. I mean, you half the blogging world reading your stuff anyhow, so you are a PR machine. You could probably type "Hi" as your post and have about 50-60 people comment on it.

But it's all so true. "iFriends" are really great because sometimes you can be even more honest with them. I truly think that blogs are the new black.....everyone seems to have one, or read one, or at the very least, know of one.

Thanks for giving me a reason to look forward to Mondays (b/c until Bachelor comes back on, my Mondays are a bit dull).

Lindsay said...

Basically I come over here to read my own's quite scary, actually, how much we think alike - only for some reason my thoughts never make it past my, well, thoughts....I'll work on that. For now I'll just stick to posting pictures with few words because, well, you must steal my thoughts from me! Thanks. Thanks a lot. ;-)

Mama B said...

Please ignore this comment if it;s grammatically incorrect or not witty but it's 9:01 so it's past my bedtime :-)

I love the term ifriends, so cute. And tghat's all I got, I just wanted you to know I stopped my tired haze!

Unknown Mami said...

There is nothing like reading nice things about yourself from someone you dig. Thank you ifriend!

Brandy said...

This is really neat! I love meeting new friends and making friendships!!

Anonymous said...

Awww! Thanks! I feel way better about fantasizing about living in the same neighborhood with all my iFriends. I was getting a little worried there. But I love having you as my ifriend, which is a super clever name, by the way. And I'd guest post if I knew what that meant. I only play a tech-savvy blogger on tv.
Um, should we all do a New Moon post?

Maya said...

I love all the people I'm starting to meet blogging. Lots in common. Kind of scary for others, comforting to me.

SmartPumpkin'sMom said...

Awwww...LOL. You just the sugar to my wound. LOL. Thank you so very much!!!! I love you! :D

One Cluttered Brain said...

Geeez. Scroll through a million comments just to get to this post a comment gotta work on that...Comment at top maybe?

I don't know...

First of all jack hole? OMG! Hilarious!!!1 Love your new word. i might have to borrow it some time.

I likey---I-friends...kinda like the I phone I don't have...REally someday I will have one.

LOVE the part about how you went off on that woman at work who looks like an eight year old...LOVE it...wet your pants hilarious...Speaking of which...Excuuuuse me....

I'm back. Dry pants and all.
Ok. Just give me the low down on all this guest blogging and what not. Is alls I get is a link on your blog? I was hoping for like 2 minutes of fame...maybe a vlog or a blog post so everyone can see how awesome I am....

I am going to check out some of the peeps U mentioned too.... By golly I am going to be here aLL day... well not really I do get up from time to time and feed the cats and my 2 year old. Not in that order of course....heheh.

did U stop by my blog yet? WHY the heck not???

I'll foregive you this time.... saw JUstin Timberlake???

EGADS man....I would be all over him. But not like MAtthew McConoaughey...I LOVE Matthew! He is my yin to my yang...wait a min that is my hubby---he is AWESOME...and he totally knows about ALL my crushes.....

I heart christopher meloni from SVU too.

Long enuf comment for ya?

ANd yes I did read yer sh**. I didn't cuss in the comment cause maybe You won't actualyl publish it. Although I hope U do....cause you are DA bomb...Right up there with Supah.....

SupahMommy said...

omg she did not just mention mchey hey

i love your post and i am so sorry that i was not around ( jaden's auction card) to thank you for the lovely shout out.

i heart you all kinna ways..

and um. grammatically correct. I must be your exception to the rule.

i promise ill be back as a loyal fan that i am .. in two weeks.. just in time for the drought that is christmas bloggin time.

fer real. thank you.. it's an honor to be shouted by you because: well.. i stalked you and loved you instantly from day 1.

angie said...

I have a tear in my eye now. To think that I almost missed this post and would have never known kills me.

I think you are fab.....and to think that we actually met in real life too. Sigh.

I want to do a guest post. Please? Pretty please?

Ghada said...

Hey hey, just discovered you today over at the Stumble club. After reading 2 posts, I like your style so I'm sure I'm gonna stick around.
Would love to get involved with your iFriends Mondays in the future - not sure how yet :)
Good post, reminds people to be kind even from behind their computer.

Anonymous said...

I wasn't prepared to make new friends when I first started blogging. I was just writing in response to an action in my life where I felt wronged.

To discover the love and support from other bloggers. How people share their heart and life and it affect and enriches. TRULY AMAZING.

Blogging has changed my world and opened up. I am so glad to find new friends all around.

Thanks for all your fav bloggie friends!

I'm NOT a VOLCANO! said...

Okay, I'm totally IN!!! YAY! More excellent blogs to read!!

Giving away two copies of the movie Extract starring Jason Bateman and Ben Affleck. Contest ends 4/2/10.
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