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Saturday, May 9, 2009

My Day

We all know that Mother's Day is fast approaching.

Technically, today is the last shopping day in order for Hubby to secure a gift, provided that he is so inclined to purchase one. Although, he is known for the last minute hurrah, so I wouldn't be surprised if he were MIA come this time tomorrow morning.

But, he is not required to purchase one.

Being that Mother's Day, my birthday, and our anniversary are all marked in May, I fully expect the infamous "big" gift.

Although, to be fair, he's never really done that. Skipped the anniversary entirely, yes. Combined the three "holidays" into one big gift, no.

So, I think it's safe to assume that in addition to the homemade gifts (that I truly LOVE), he is going to hit up the local department store (I'm hoping more Macy's, less Sears) and select something to commemorate the day I became Mommy.

Now, I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth (not, directly anyway), but there are a few items I prefer not to receive (even though I will act overjoyed, so as not to hurt anyone's feelings if I do) on the big day.

1. Exercise Equipment. I like to workout as much as the next person (which judging by the fat epidemic in America, is probably not all that much). Let me rephrase, I workout because I'm trying not to be mistaken for a cow (yes, this has happened, ask #2). And, even though I sometimes have the desire to try a new workout DVD, or have my runs tracked by my shoes and a fancy bracelet (actually, this was an AWESOME gift), I do not want Hubby buying me workout related gifts. I just feel like he's confirming that I'm fat, and that he's willing to invest money in changing that. Plus, if he buys it then I feel all guilty if I don't use it. So I have to set up elaborate schemes in which I leave the disk in the DVD player and the weights on the floor in front of the TV to make it look like I worked out. When in reality, I was at the computer writing a blog post all afternoon. So. Much. Work.

2. A DVD set. I love Heroes, and The Office, and I'd love to get into Sex and the City (totally missed that boat), and... you get the picture. Unfortunately, I have zero time to even watch the shows I Tivo on a weekly basis (explains why we only have 4% recording space left), and I really don't have time to pick up any new shows (except when So You Think You Can Dance comes back this summer). Plus, I have a sneaking suspicion that he is well aware of my time constraints, and might try to purchase the Band of Brothers Box Set so we can watch it "together". Right.

3. Anything used for cleaning. I don't do it, and I don't like to be quilted into it. So, please skip anything that is, or looks like it could be, used for cleaning. This includes a steam cleaner (I know I said I want one, but not for a gift), a Roomba (would be nice, but again, not as a gift), or the cool looking UV-C Sanitizing Light Wand that I told you about (it's like a magic cleaning wand!).

4. Tickets to a kid centered activity. I love the aquarium (can't wait to see Baltimore's new dolphin show), the zoo, and the children's museum. But I have no interest in spending my special day chasing kiddies around the fish tanks, or carrying a 26 pound chunker through the place since they don't allow strollers (not sure whose cockamamie, hair brained idea that was). I'd love to take trips to all of these places this summer. But, on Mother's Day, I'd much rather stay at home and have a fun-filled, periodically stressful day, as opposed to taking a day trip to a stressful, periodically fun destination. Just humor me on this one:).

5. A McDonald's Gift Certificate. According to #2's heartfelt Mother's Day Card that he made for me with the help of his conniving thoughtful preschool teachers, I have quite the affinity for McDonald's. Apparently, it is my "favorite place to go." I am convinced that teachers do these "All About Mom" interviews with kids just to see what funny (aka embarrassing) tidbits the kids will reveal. Mine always oblige. And, if anyone even wants to hear my side of the story, Mickey D's is not my favorite place to go. I go there b/c you like it, and you are hungry, and impatient, and in one of your beggy-won't-take-no-for-an-answer moods after soccer. I don't go there because I can't think of one other place I'd like to dine (although,now that you bring it up, MCD's is the only eatery I can think of), I'd love to eat at some grown up place I can't think of the name of since I haven't been there in so long. Point is, I go there for you, dude, so appreciate it.

Can't wait to see what you ladies get.

I'll be happy to share with you all on Monday.

Happy Mother's Day to all of my digital mom friends:)


Dee said...

LOL... my grandmother's birthday was on December 24, Christmas was on December 25 and she got married on December 26. She honestly thought she would get 3 gifts for those days. Nope. Only 1. She too felt cheated out.

Hoping all mom's have a good day. I don't expect anything snce the history is that my son never does anything or no one is there to help him get it. I won't get the call, the flowers, or a card. I guess I'm not appreciated. the music on your site!

Safe hugz,
A Mom's Journey

Happy Mother's day!

Shawn said...

Heh! Well said...and ditto for me. It's weird I'm yelling at the family today to get some cleaning done and we are supposed to be all nicey nicey tomorrow! I settle for peace a little more often.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

I can totally relate - my hubby is a 'last minute shopper', too... Although he did forewarn me that since the budget is so tight this year that he won't be able to do much - but he got some Red Lobster gift cards given to him at work for rewards, so he figures he'll take me out to dinner with those...I figure we'll wait until it's the halfway point between Mother's Day and Father's Day and count that dinner for both...HA! :) I'll be looking forward to see if you get anything not on that list! (grin!!)

Stopping by from MBC's Follow Me Club - I'm your newest follower! It's nice to 'meet' you - have a Happy Mother's Day! :)

Dinosaur Mom said...

Cool blog, hope you have a good mother's day.

Shannon said...

I love your honesty! Sometimes I wish I were this honest - with myself- let alone the people I know and love - and especially my blogfriends! :) Hope you have a great day and get a well-thought-through gift from your hubby and kids!

Giving away two copies of the movie Extract starring Jason Bateman and Ben Affleck. Contest ends 4/2/10.
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