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Wednesday, December 2, 2009

I Was Right!

Which is no big surprise, because it happens like pretty much always.

But still.

This time it actually means something.

See…

_MG_9149

Do you know what this means?

It means that my baby is allergic to peanuts (WHY!? crying hysterically, beating fist on desk, WHHHHYYY?!).

_MG_9117

And, as I sat in Dr. Allergies’ office yesterday waiting for the bell to ring while #3 performed contortion trying to claw at his skin (which is not supposed to hurt, btw, but kind does when you are only 1. At least that’s what it looked like and sounded like to me as #3 yelled, “Mommy, it hurt. It hurt!  Wub my back!  Pease, Mommy.  Wub it! For fifteen minutes straight.)  I was torn about how I wanted the test to come out.

Naturally, I hoped that after 13 months (this all started back here, when he had his 17 days of diarrhea episode) of investigative work that would make professional CSIers proud, 10 months of begging for allergy tests (took me at least 3 to come to the conclusion that it was probably an allergy and not one of the other 55 things Dr. Goggle suggested it could be), and 2 breakouts of full blown, body covering hives, I would be wrong, and that he wasn’t going to be the Peanut Allergy Kid for the rest of his life.

Because, no one wants to be that kid. 

The one for whom they instituted the No Birthday Parties at school rule (can’t take cupcakes or anything anymore).

The one who doesn’t get to eat any of his Halloween Candy or the Christmas cookies or pretty much anything until it’s been thoroughly inspected.

The one whose Mommy has to go into the class and “talk” to the teacher, or into his buddy’s house and “talk” to his Mommy so that there aren’t any <strike>potentially fatal</strike>mix-ups.

The one with the big needle (even if it does just look like a super cool ink pen) in his backpack.

I didn’t want any of that for him.

But, if I’m honest (and I always am, except for when it comes to talking about what I ate for snack today, and then I’m strictly a don’t ask, don’t tell kinda chick) there was a small part of me that just wanted the test to be positive.

Because I really just wanted to be right.  But not for the reasons I normally want to be right.

For other reasons.

Like, that I am tired of keeping food journals about every little morsel he makes contact with.  Adding, subtracting, substituting, finding the square root of pretty much everything he eats was getting tiresome.

And, I was anxious to find a solution.  I could see that something was obviously wrong.  Last week nearly every inch of skin on the poor kid was covered with some sort of red, itchy, puss filled? puffiness, including the inside of his mouth.  And, the horror that was being deposited into his diaper by some evil creature of death was nearly unbearable.  For both of us.  There was just absolutely no way that there was nothing wrong.  Healthy humans do smell (or look) the way he did.  So, instead of continuing on the vision quest for truth that has been consuming us for the past 13 months, I was hopeful that we had finally located the key that could lock all this ugly away for a bit.

And then , there’s my fragile momtuition to consider.  For it’s sake, I really needed to be right on this one.  After all of my hard work, my battles with the oh-I’m-sure-it’s-nothing-let’s-just-see-medical-degree-holding naysayers, I really just wanted to be able to say: IN YO FACE DOC!  I needed to be able to trust that at least I know my baby.  I may not know much about crafting, or stain removing, or toilet cleaning, or even how to not yell at them when they punch each other in the face.  But, I know my babies.  And, I knew something wasn’t right.

The pleasure I feel now for not giving up (as they basically suggested), for knowing in my heart that something was amiss, and for fighting with them to get him evaluated is almost enough to cancel out the sadness I feel for the fact that he will never again savor the deliciousness of a peanut M&M.

Almost.

Mommy’s sorry sweetness:(

xmas_a3 

 

Feel free to leave your tips/suggestions if you are a similarly affected family.  I really just don’t know what kids eat for lunch if it’s not PB&J sandwiches, which, for the record, he literally asks me for at least 3 times per week.



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28 comments:

sheila said...

Uh. My oldest, now 19 has a horrible nut/peanut allergy. She's old enough to carry the Epi-pen with her and use it...but I always instruct her close friends how to use it.

We learned of the allergy at age 3 when she was rolling pine cones in peanut butter and bird seed at preschool. Just touching it sent her off.

If you ever have questions, feel free to email me. s.s.burke(at!)juno.com

Simply Valorie said...

Hmm. That really stinks for him. :( At least it's not latex, no one wants to be that kid.


Try mac and cheese? Lunchables-type things, like pizza tend to work out.

erin - the Mom Buzz said...

Poor kid! I am so sorry! At least you have answers!

4 Lettre Words said...

This breaks my heart b/c I so LOVE me some peanut butter. I actually just had a spoonful. Seriously.

Poor baby. At least he is stunningly beautiful.

blueviolet said...

It's so much better to know now. You'll be prepared and can keep him safe.

ShellSpann said...

Those allergy tests are NOT fun. My daughter had one when she was about 18 months old. She has asthma so they were trying to pinpoint her triggers. Luckily neither of my kids have a nut allergy but there are several kids in my daughter's class that do. I can't even imagine :( I wish I had suggestions, but I don't really know much about it. *HUGS*

Jennifer said...

I'm sorry. I have a friend that one kid has a milk and egg allergy and the other one has a nut allergy. I don't know how she does it, but she has managed. And you will too. I just feel so bad for no 3, because you are definitely right. Being that kid is no fun.

Oh, the good thing, my friend says it is just normal for her kids to not accept food from people without asking quesitons. They've just become kind of trained.

Evonne said...

It is better to know and good for you for continuing to fight and get an answer!

I think my son has an allergy to something and when they tried to draw blood for an allergy test it didn't work. 45 minutes of poking and prodding to tell me the needle was to big and they couldn't do it. Ugh!

My question is, is it just peanuts he's allergic to, or all nuts in general? Lunchables are always good, just watch what snack they come with.

Evonne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BlogBaby said...

Well this new development may be the nail in the coffin on my burgeoning relationship with #3. How will we ever share a box of smarties or an entire bag of chocolate chip cookies. HOW??

It's all very sad. Sigh.

Oh and please for the love of all that is good in the world, no more pictures of #3 in pain, this little heart of mine can't take it!

BlogBaby

Kim @ What's That Smell? said...

That just simply sucks.

My son is allergic to watermelon (like NO ONE in the world is allergic to it except him...weirdo) so it's not as problematic for us as that peanuts.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

I'm glad you were persistent and were able to get it figured out early. Poor kid!

Princess Nagger prefers just jelly sandwiches cut with a dinosaur sandwich cutter. She's not allergic to peanuts, but for some reason prefers to NOT have PB&J...just J. :) Maybe doing the sandwiches in fun shapes will make him forget about the PB part! :)

Mira is triplet crown said...

ugh, I hate it when you tell a dr something you know but you don't have the scientific community behind you so you must be wrong. Stupid doctors. Yea you mommy! Not so dumb today!

And I am afraid of that allergy too but you know they've done a study recently where they gave them minute doses of peanut, increasing in quantity for x amount of time and actually rewired them to not be allergic. In that area where you live I bet there's some study you could get into or test program to do that. Check it out! You really can un-allergy them if you get in with the right people. Best of luck.

Alicia said...

OH NO!!!! poor little dude!! that's rough!! and i have no tips in this department....awww i just wanna snuggle his cute little face! ummmm i'm thinking arranged marriage! our youngest would make some gorgeous babies!!!

Manic-Momma said...

Oh no! That's aweful-my best friends son is allergic to peanuts as well. SERIOUSLY- Us busy moms RELY on the stuff!!

some alternatives might be:
hummus, cream cheese, almond butter(not sure if he's allergic to all nuts, or just peanuts?), soy nut butter, sunflower seed butter just to name a few

Hope that helps!

KK said...

I'm sorry for the little guy, but so glad you know. When we finally figured out I'm allergic to tree nuts, it made my world much better. When I avoid them, I don't get sick or hives and life is good!

Adrian's Crazy Life said...

I totally get what you're saying. It is sad that he has to have this allergy, but I'm sorry the doctors wouldn't listen to you in the first place. Doctors are such goobers sometimes.

I had the exact opposite experience yesterday. The instacare Dr. tried to convince me that there was something dire wrong with my son because he's had 3 broken bones in 3 years. Well, duh, he's a boy! Fortunately, the ortho just laughed it off and said no way, which was just what I was hoping to hear.

I didn't want the boy with the glass bones who ends up in a cast every time some other kid even touches him. Thankfully, it seems that I won't.

Don't know what to tell you on the PB&J front - ham & cheese maybe?

faemom said...

I'm sorry you had to go through that to be proven that yes, you're right, your son has allergies. But at least you know.
And they think they can reverse a peanut allergy.
How about jelly roll ups or turkey and cheese roll ups?

Jen Harms Wilson said...

I've heard really good things about sunflower seed butter.
Check it out: http://www.sunbutter.com/

Sarah said...

That's too bad for him...but at least you know, now. And it's so common these days - I'm not really sure anyone thinks about it too much anymore. When I taught school, it seems like that's just the way things were!

parentingBYdummies said...

Thanks everyone for leaving such kind comments and helpful ideas. That I've had a chance to process the reality more I'm feeling a little more at ease about the whole situation. Well, I was until I found out how much the dang Epipen was gonna cost us! Holy smokes, it's a good thing I love this kid!

Mama B said...

That sucks...my husband has tree nut allergies and he never gets dessert unless I make it myself at home.....

and Yeah for being right! You NEED to be an advocate for yourself and your children in medicine. it's not because your doctors are not smart and capable, it's that they are pressed for quality time with you and they are trained to not jump to the first guess...to look at everything, to see horses not Zebras...

Good Luck...

Libby said...

Welcome to the club...we've got jackets. I'm seconding the Sunbutter suggestion. It's one of our staples. Try lurking around the bento and lunch blogs for lots of good ideas. (Start at lunchinabox.net.)

Kmama said...

I'm so glad I read this. My son, Buddy, has a rap sheet of foods he's allergic to, seriously, more than the allergist had ever seen. The skin prick test came back positive for nuts, so they sent him for a blood test. Did #3 get the blood test to check for other food allergies? That's where all of Buddy's positives came back. Next week, I'm posting all of his food allergies, per a follower's question.

We carry an Epi-pen wherever we go, and since Buddy is 5 and in school, school has one, and even the before care program has one.

You are right...you will always be going into school and into friend's houses to explain what he can and can't eat. hopefully for you, it's limited to peanuts. For us, most of the time, we get asked, "What can he eat?"

kys said...

It's good that you found out now. We don't have these issues at my house so I don't have any advice. But I have lots of sympathy for you guys. And he's adorable.

Safire said...

My daughter's best friend is allergic to peanuts. It's been a change for us, because he's SO allergic. Snacks and baking stuff has to be gone over. I think the biggest thing they are struggling with is that the school does not allow him to have his epi pen on him at all times. Also, his mom gives the teacher a box of okay treats (rice krispy treats, hard candy, etc) if someone brings something in he can't have. As for lunches, plain jelly sandwiches are good, as well as lunch meat, cheese and crackers, left over pizza or mac and cheese, soup, etc. Just be glad it wasn't a milk allergy. That one is horrible.

craftyashley said...

If it's just peanuts he's allergic to, you can try different nut spreads. I've seen almond spread at the market before.
Good luck! I'm petrified of my kids being "that kid" too.

angie said...

Oh No. Poor guy. Poor mom.

This is such an unwelcome development. Boo.

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