Nothing has happened, specifically, it's sorta just an underlying thing that haunts me daily as I gaze longingly at the Travel Channel (I really like Anthony Bourdain's show, not sure why), read through other people's blogs (and they're not all mom blogs b/c I kinda get sick of hearing about people just like me), and avoid playing Transformers, or chase, or pretty much everything (give me a break, I have like zero experience being Optimus Prime, I would totally rock at barbies, though).
It's mom guilt, the fat-constantly-judging-nagging-annoying-always-in-the-back-of-my-mind-can-I-get-one-effing-minute-alone elephant in the room, that I have been encouraged to admit to by Mama Kat (thank you for highlighting the fact that I suck).
So, here's my confession: I'm ready for summer to end and for school to start and for 66% of my band of brothers to be at school at least part time 3 days per week (I'll take what I can get at this point).
We are only nearing the end of week 2 of our summer vacation, and I find that I am looking forward to doing the school shopping (partly b/c I LOVE shopping, even when it's not for me). I'm cursing my decision to only do a couple of weeks of camp. And, I'm thinking about next year, when #2 will be at his least favorite place (aka preschool) for three (YES!) half days per week. And, I feel a little bad for longing for less togetherness (not a lot bad, but a little).
Worst part: summer hasn't even been horrible.
We've actually had some pretty fun days, and I have many more planned, but I'm tired of coming up with a daily, all encompassing schedule that keeps them from crying bored without involving the television too much.
I'm really just not that creative (plus I like TV).
I know they don't have to be entertained constantly, but they sure do a good job of acting like it.
I'm tired of hearing them complain that they are bored and they are too hot or too tired or too lonely (neighborhood kids are at camp) to play outside. And, it pulls at the one heart string I have left to watch #1 stand around outside kicking rocks while #2 naps (& napping is 100% nonnegotiable).
So, I feel guilty.
Not, all-encompassing-I-suck-so-bad guilty, just a little sorry-dudes-you'll-get-over-it-just-like-I-will guilty for wishing them busy.
Oh, and I'm SO over the play date thing.
Which I would feel guilty about if I weren't too busy being disgusted.
Which leads nicely to the thank you note of the week (best I could do for red, white & blue)...
Thank you, and you're welcome.
It reads: Dear Mom of kid my kid plays with, Thanks for suggesting we set up another play date for the kids. Unfortunately, due to recent events, we will have to decline further opportunities to host (but you are more than welcome to do the honors). And, just to give you something to work on for future events, you may want to discuss proper younger brother etiquette with your son. Specifically, it is rarely appropriate to lock a preschooler in the bathroom "for fun", and "tricking" him into getting you stuff is not really okay either. Furthermore, I, contrary to popular belief, do not run a restaurant, so when I serve PB&J and you send it back to "trade" for "turkey with one piece of orange cheese" you are setting yourself up for disappointment. You asked for it, so stop crying. Crying is not allowed. Hopefully once these issues are resolved we reconsider our position on this matter. Until then, our house is officially off limits. XOXO, Dumb Mom
Please note: Mom was not in attendance. Instead, this was the worst sort of play date arrangement, the drop and go. Participation in play dates of this nature is never advised or encouraged.
2 days ago