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Sunday, February 7, 2010

Things Boys Do

When there is a blizzard dumping a butt load of snow outside and trying it’s darnedest to ruin your life with its stupid white, powdery-soft-but-will-frost-bite-you-in-a-heartbeat-if-you’re-not-careful stupidness…

After you haul out all of the are-you-seriously-still-eating-that-stuff-Dude? Play-doh, and the bored board games, and the books you’ve read so many times they give you nightmares, and the Wii.

When you are at your wit’s end with the creative-indoor-games-that-are-fun-and-safe-but-don’t-require-a-lot-of-supplies.

There is little else for a murder of boys (murder, that’s what they call a group of crows; seems to fit this particular scenario perfectly) to do other than…

1. Fight. Which they do without the interference of a Snowmergency, but for some reason, when I can’t escape (aka get to work) it is WAY more unbearable.

2. Cry. No wait. That was me.

3. Run. Around, and around, and around. What inspired builders to make houses this way? Is it a design specifically created to allow little boys to drive their mother’s mad? Probably since most of the builders are male and after day three of SnowMG 2010, I’m convinced that all males are evil geniuses with a secret plot to end those of us who bear them.

4. Get dirty. Not in the traditional way (you know with grass stains and the like). In new, more creative ways than before. Like by rubbing blue Play-doh so hard for so long that it turns to paint which you then apply to your face as war paint. Because, you know, as I already mentioned, this is a war, against me, and all I stand for (cleanliness, sanity, order, etc.).

5. Stuff their faces. Dang it. That was me again. Snowbastard 2010 is turning Dumb Mom into a Snowfata$$. I’m willing to bet that by the time this Snowfoolishness has run its course I’ll be a good five pounds heavier. Just another side effect of being trapped inside: you can’t escape the foodstuffs that are calling your name.

6. Fight more. But over different stuff. Like, whose turn it is to sit on my lap (WHAT?! You want to touch me? In a nice way? That doesn’t end in my injury and/or death?!). Or who gets to help me empty the upstairs trash cans. Dumb stuff that wouldn’t come up were they not going insane with cabin fever.

7. Wait. For it to end. So they can wait some more for it to be cleaned up. Or melt. From what I know about my (privately plowed) community, we have a better chance of it melting first.

8. Make stuff up. Like new games. They called this one Daddy Swing…

Which they made up right after Daddy Donkey and Daddy Dork (oh wait, Daddy Dork was my game and it was fun).

9. Cry again. By this time they are all in on the crying action.

10. Cuddle with their mom because they have run out of things to do and even fighting with each other has gotten old. Never thought the day would come when they would get tired of fighting. Guess that’s why we’re calling it Snowmagedeon!

I’m sure I could write a heartfelt post about how happy we are to be enjoying time together, but the fact of the matter is that is not the case. I’m just not feeling it and neither are they. We are not at each other’s throats (okay they were for a bit) or anything, but all this nothing to do-ness and can’t play outside-ness is a drain on the psyche of boys and their moms. I know I should be more creative, but I’m not so if any of you have tips for things-to-do-with-boys-when-trapped-in-a-blizzard-that-are-easy-and-don’t-require-a-butt-load-of-supplies send them my way because from what I hear we’re looking at the possibility of no school for a week!

AHHHHHHHHHH!

Okay, off to process that possibility while I await a ride to my stupid-face-stupid-ugly-dummy-head job where they will quite possibly hold me prisoner for the next three days (they agree to bring you in, but no one said anything about bringing me back).

Thought this would be a perfect Sunday’s in My City post to share with Unknown Mami. Go check her out for more!



Unknown Mami

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nope. No suggestions. I do have a few for Mummy ...but as they have to do with a nice bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon that's probably not such a good idea! ;)

Sonya said...

Oh boy as a mother of two I can relate..lol Thank goodness the snow is over and I can boot both of them out the door!

Keyona said...

Guess I better get prepared for when this little boy is born. Lord help me......

Bekah said...

Bake cookies? Build a pillow & blanket fort? write and illustrate books? plop them in front of the tv with a nice dose of benadryl??

Formerly known as Frau said...

I would have cabin fever to sending them out in the snow never seems to last as long as you want. Hope you stay warm and drive safe. Happy Sunday!

Kmama said...

I seriously can't imagine. Ever since Buddy got up this morning, the two have been in each other's faces. UGH!

Unknown said...

Those boys of yours are so flipping cute. I can't take it : )! And so is daddy! How did he feel about Daddy is a Dork game? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

Corinne said...

Good ole cabin fever. It drives as all insane.

Unknown said...

Oh see I would allow them outside in short snippets of time.. Just enough to play in it and realize how ding dang cold it is and come running back in grateful for a warm house and a mom who helps me get into dry clothes lol..

Unknown said...

Oh no! I hope you don't get stuck at work! It's been quite an adventurous weekend!

Liz Mays said...

I had four brothers and your post brings it all back to me!!!!

AudreyO said...

Girls love crafts. We can stamp, bead, scrapbook etc. Boys...they need the outdoors. Unless you put a tree in the middle of your house LOL.

Evonne said...

My kids are so tired from playing in Snowmageddon yesterday that they're trying to kill each other today. My solution? Send them back out for more! I think I'll give them shovels this time to finish what I started.

Good luck!

Jennifer said...

The post about how much you love all the together time would have been boring and gaggy... and you are neither of those things. I hope it gets better for y'all soon.

jp said...

love your blog!

4 Lettre Words said...

There was some mud-play at our house today. (It's boring in the ATL, too.)

Twincerely,Olga said...

being stuck inside sucks!!!Great Post!!!

Melissa B. said...

We're getting cabin fever over here, too. No school tomorrow, and it's looking like no school for Tuesday, either. Holy Guacamole, Batman...I've never SEEN so much SNOW!

Lisa said...

Hi. I love looking at the picture of your children. They are so adorable.

Maggie S said...

Be proactive. Assign them the task of running around and screaming until you tell them to stop. They will go around a few times and then run up laughing and ask if it is time to stop. "No, not yet; go again. And remember to keep screaming." It will be time to release them from the assignment when they are sweaty and slowing down. For some reason this works. It is not as annoying because you told them to do it. When they are done, they seem, for some reason, better able to settle down and focus. I used this trick at the end of the day when I was a nanny. It never failed.

TanishaRenee said...

I am a mom to 2 little boys and I can relate, especialy to the feeling of wanting to "escape" LOL! Thank goodness we didn't get as much snow as was predicted. After a million refrains of "mommy can you play the Wii with me", I'm ready to scream!

Thanks for stopping by my blog! Have a great day!

Claudya Martinez said...

That daddy swing is awesome because it doesn't require batteries.

Anonymous said...

Ok, that sucks. I would have gone insane by now. Way to keep in there and not run out naked in the snow. Good luck.

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