Fair Day

Friday, September 24th was a special day in the slice of Americana I call home.

It was Fair Day.

Not sure what that is?

Well, it's not the day that things go my way simply because I deserve it.

Actually, this particular Fair Day was distinctively unfair as it marked the beginning of a royally effed weekend, starting off bright and early with #3 dropping my cell phone into a glass of water (thankfully, after drying out for a good day and a half, it has slowly come back into existence).

As I went through the tremors and hot flashes associated with texting withdraw, I had a number of other semi-tragedies to make my day complete: I broke a plate (a wedding gift plate no less, which I'm refusing to consider an omen), some winged demon bit me on the face (possibly it was a mosquito, but it felt curiously like a mini dragon), and I drove all the way to soccer practice before I realized that I forgot #2's change of shoes which meant that in order to complete our day's activities (without tacking on an additional 40 minutes worth of driving time) I had to purchase him a new pair.

And, this was just the beginning. I also had the opportunity to photograph a completely rained out wedding on Saturday (but the show must go on even if that does mean we had to move indoors to a place with fluorescent lighting, I know, blech), only to return home to a hideously broken garage door.

I realize you didn't ask for all that, and that you probably just want to know what Fair Day is, but you know, too bad.

Fine.

Fair Day is the day where our rural county gives all of the school children a day off to brutally harass their mothers by fighting nonstop with their siblings in a vicious attempt to systematically drive her insane visit the county fair, free of charge.

I'm certain that such a day was appreciated, and even necessary, when this area was predominately supported by agricultural enterprises.

You know, back when 4-H was the shiznitz (some people argue that this is still the case, but I'm here to tell you, as a former 4H camper, it decidedly is not).

But, today, when farmers are selling their land to developers and people buy local produce because it's trendy, it's really just a day that the kids get to miss school for no apparent reason other than to make me wish they were there.

I mean, a visit to the fair before 5pm wasn't even possible since they didn't open the carnival midway until then. And, seriously, my kids woulda lost it, had a bona-fide-can-you-even-blame-them-for-losing-it fit, if I marched them past the darkened rides to checkout the county's best in the bovine, fowl, and home cooked dessert departments.

I would never torture them (or myself) that way.

So, in my estimation, they coulda went to school, and still made a pretty good showing at the fair. After 5pm. With Mommy in a happy mood. Which makes a world of difference. For everyone.

But, where do you think Dumb Mom and crew could be found Friday night around 7:00pm (had soccer practice, followed by a 40 minute stint in fair related traffic before we could make it there)?

That's right baby, the Frederick County Fair.

Naturally we had a blast.

Riding rides,



eating crappy, but magically delicious, fair food,



being duped by carny double talk (obviously not me, but the kids fell hook, line, and sinker for this one),



and checking out all of the fair related livestock.



The most significant part of Fair Day, 2009 was that it was Hubby's inaugural visit to the event.

Can you believe, a 30-something year old grown up man never once having had the pleasure of visiting a fair?!

He was surprised, he was intrigued, and he was excited to see that the fair is like a microcosm of America itself.

Every group you can label is represented at the fair: young, old, rich, poor, black, white, fat, skinny, legal, illegal, pimps, hoes, everyone, all yucking it up at the fair.

And, the social ills tend to be alive and well there also: teen pregnancy, underage drinking, statutory rape, prostitution (although, I'm not sure what you call it if no money actually exchanges hands), drugs, sex, lies, and videotape.

It's amazing how something like the fair brings people, who would otherwise have no dealings with each other, together for some good old fashion get-drunk-and-start-a-fight-with-your-buddy, fun.

It's heart warming, isn't it?

Really makes you feel like a member of the community.