She's a Brick Hoooouse

Only song I can recall from the birthday night extravaganza.

But, let me back up.

I'm sure you all have so been dying to hear about the big, Dummy-turns-31-weekend (or not, but whatever, I'm telling anyway).

Friday was almost the end of Hubby and me (and those blasted kids,too).

You know I provided the requisite amount of, oh-don't-worry-about-its, no-need-to-buy-a-gift (better get at least a card you ungrateful little turds) that I do every year.

And, when I skulked off to work Friday afternoon, I was certain they had obliged.

I was feeling pretty much like this...


But, upon returning home (after a long cell phone call with BFF in which I explained the reasons my family sucked), I was happily surprised with a lovely HP laptop computer! I basically felt like this...



It was served alongside a delicious, Oreo cookie laced, ice cream cake from Coldstone Creamery (a place every woman should have the opportunity to experience) to die for.

Thank. You. Very. Much.

Saturday, I had plans.

Big plans.

Big plans which involved a chick flick (Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, Mr. McConaughey is hotness), a nice friendly dinner, followed by a couple of hours of inebriated dancing.

Despite the fact that three of my "best" buds bailed (yes I am giving you ladies crap), BFF and I thoroughly enjoyed our evening.

The movie was cute and funny (I never agree w/those rotten tomato haters).

The food (especially the carbs) was delectable.



The drinks (except for the root beer float martini, GAG!) were well blended.




And, the music/dancing was (mostly) perfect (you know, perfect mix of me doing awesome, awe inspiring moves to music requested almost entirely by me, with an occasional sucky song contributed by the local drunk chicks so that they could hopelessly try to outshine me. Better luck next year, ladies!).

But the funnest, and most unexpected joy of the evening came in the form of shoes.

DSW, shoes.

BFF and I decided to work off some of the movie snackage by going on an impromptu footwear shopping spree! Hooray for me!!!

I rarely buy shoes, not because I don't love them, because like any warm blooded American girl, I totally do.

It's just that I rarely have the required free moments needed to truly "shop" for shoes.

'Cause shoe shopping, it's a science, and like any science, it requires accuracy and precision. Something I can not adhere to when the dudes are in tow.

Plus, I dream of shoes like these...



The expertly named, out of my price range, don't match with one thing in my closet gems that I fall in love with on sight, but rarely never have the cajones to purchase.

And, I wind up purchasing comfortable, functional, efficient numbers like these...


That are obviously cute, but fall extremely short of the sexy, daring, naughty monkey I used to be.

I know. I'm different now. I'm practical and punctual and cute(which is dramatically different from sexy).

But, guess what?

It was my birthday (and my single, sexy BFF was there to pump me up).

So, I went out on a limb and I got these, too (I know crazy, right? One day, two pairs of shoes?).



They may not be Manolo stilettos, but at least they aren't flat, and they don't lace. Which, to me, makes them very close to the same thing:).

Had to rush off and get some of these, though to kill the shoe shopping guilt...


Following film, shoes, and food, we went for a quick rump shake at a local watering hole.

We tired quite quickly of the oldies but goodies (and I'm referring to the clientele, not the music), and made it home by midnight.

Which was perfect because I needed to rest up for my Sunday afternoon date with Hubby.

And, come Sunday afternoon, right around nap time, our departure time arrived.

Once we settled Mimi (aka babysitter extraordinaire) with the dudes, Hubby whisked me off to the Cheesecake Factory, were I enjoyed a yummy shrimp sandwich.

We then followed our stuffed guts to the movie theater (yes, I really do love the movies) to enjoy Star Trek.

And, even though I am not anywhere close to being a Trekky, I totally loved it.

The film was AWESOME, but again I had significant issues with the clientele (future post alert!).

All in all, it was a marvelous 31st birthday weekend.

I encourage every mom to make an event of the birthday.

At least take a couple of days out of the year and focus on you.

It definitely softens the saggy-boobs-is-that-a-varicose-vein?-what-happened-to-jeans-with-odd-sizes(5-7-9)-I'm-getting-old blow.